not over yet.

*sigh. i dont feel much pleased...... with the overall effort i put into my P6 paper today. suicidal... that's the sh*t i'm going through now.

nnnnnnnnnnaaaaaaaaaaaawww~!! Bwahahahahaha just a joke there!!!! hahahahaha. it'd take me forever to feel that way!!! :P . i just feel that my blog is in lack of emo confessions here~ unlike how most teenagers put into theirs... be it about their *oh-my-gosh-i-live-in-hell* lifestyle or their passion for monkey love!

Speaking about that... I don't know hmm. I don't believe in love anymore. I was having a pleasant chat with one of my more "experienced" friends who is at the edge of her 20s.... "When we are still young to know completely what life is all about, we consider an attraction towards a guy as LOVE. And only later in our years, do we know that.... that was never love." I agreed to her. My response: Infatuation, is it then? Frankly, I am still inexperienced so I know well how stupid I still can be when I am attracted to a guy and think it's all "love is all around you" (la la laaa~) . Hahaha. So there you go, a little emo-ish stuff from me!! *gasp!* hehehe.

Otago, NZ. They offer medicine and biomedical sci. programs. Plus, MOE is giving away scholarships of Otago to leave in 2009! And application is in one month time. So I'm thinking... should I apply for it? Parents have agreed. A brief one at that, though. But I still wish to go for Aussie or UK 'cause my relatives are concentrated (not diluted :P ) over those areas. Antah eh... maybe I'll just take the propectus before going to any rash decisions (like I always do).

Anyways, I'm off to study my chem. Big day for it is in 6 days time and I can feel my legs shaking in fear (nt for a dance!). Wish me Luck... 'cause you know how I love that ;) .

"I'm Glad I'm A Man" as he say..

The poem followed is written by a special friend. Though it is probably sexist..... sorry, scratch that.. Though it IS sexist (hahaha), it's still hilarious! =D so I thought I'd like to put it up here (it's been with me for awhile) !! Beware.....not recommended for those who are prone to heart attacks and those who are pregnant.

I'm Glad I'm a Man

I'm glad I'm a man, you better believe.

I don't live off of yogurt, diet coke, or cottage cheese.

I don't bitch to my girlfriends about the size of my breasts.

I can get where I want to - north, south, east or west.

I don't get wasted after only 2 beers,

and when I do drink I don't end up in tears.

I won't spend hours deciding what to wear.

I spend 5 minutes max fixing my hair.

And I don't go around checking my reflection

in everything shiny from every direction.

I don't whine in public and make us leave early,

and when you ask why get all bitter and surly.

I'm glad I'm a man, I'm so glad I could sing.

I don't have to sit around waiting for that ring.

I don't gossip about friends or stab them in the back.

I don't carry our differences into the sack.

I'll never go psycho and threaten to kill you

or think every guy out there's trying to steal you.

I'm rational, reasonable, and logical too.

I know what the time is and I know what to do.

And I honestly think its a privilege for me

to have these two balls and stand when I pee.

I live to watch sports and play all sorts of ball.

It's more fun than dealing with women after all.

I won't cry if you say it's not going to work.

I won't reamin bitter and call you a jerk.

Fell free to use me for immediate pleasure.

I won't assume it's permanent by any measure.

Yes, I'm so very glad I'm a man, you see.

I'm glad I'm not capable of child delivery.

I don't get all bitchy every 28 days.

I'm glad that my gener gets me a much bigger raise.

I'm a man by chance and I'm thankful it's true.

I'm so glad I'm a man and not a woman like you!

wonderful, no? HAHAHAHA. He is, however, talented ... v. talented =)

The Butterfly Lovers

"I know you.. from Once Upon a Dream....."

Most recently, I watched the Butterfly Lovers. Honestly, I totally underestimated it. I always judge movies by their titles and I thought the name sounded a bit too common for my taste :P . Thought it was the low-quality, lame kind of movie aswell. However, once in the cinema... was totally embarassed by the stupid presumption I made and it was evidently pulling you into the story right from the beginning!

It's about destiny, how they've been destined to love each other right from when they were born , having dreams of each other. Sweet brabis.

The Wu Zun .

And the actor playing in this movie isssss...~ the HANDSOME bruneian Wu ZUN !!! I NEVER GOT TO KNOW THAT HE'S ACTUALLY A BRUNEIAN UNTIL YESTERDAY!! MY GOD!!! THAT's A MAJOR DOUBLE HOT *waving fingers* YUM!!!! I MEAN TO YOU!! NOT TO ME..! CAUSE HE'S NOT MY TYPE!! :P AND HE'S BRUNEIAN SOME MORE!! The female actress is also beautiful.. tapi ya.. ok2 saja lah.. hahaa~

The Lead actress cross-dressing as a male student.

NOW THIS IS MY TYPE !! I DONT KNOW WHY!! I PREFER HIM MORE THAN WU ZUN (rightbefore he got obsessive though) ! AND IT'S SUCH A COINCIDENCE HOW I FANCY THE BAD GUYS MORE THAN THE HEROES~ HMMMMM.

Okay, and thennn~ I just researched him and discoveredddd that HE IS THE BRUNEIAN DUDE WHO GOT INTO FARENHEIT AND WHOM YUM HAVE BEEN TRYING TO PROMOTE TO ME SINCE GOD KNOWS WHEN!!! AND I SERIOUSLY REGRET NOT BEING INTERESTED IN IT!

RIGHTOoO~ ONE THING I LOVE ABOUT THE MOVIE: FIGHTING SCENES WERE DAMN COOL, MAN! Seriously.. they were all good. Bigger cinematic screen gave me an advantage to watch it even better :D . I am so proud how Wu Zun can move like that! COOOOOOL BRABIS!

And then I researched more about the story behind this movie.. Rupa2nya .. the story of Butterfly Lovers was made like a very long ago.. a classic composition, a legend. No wonder, I found some scenes to have been "ancient".

And also the ending.............

Me: "Af.. ko tau apa artinya 'STUPID'?"

Afnie: "Apa?"

Me: "TU NAH .. ENDINGNYA AH!"

Ok, sorry for the spoiler. Hahaha.. tapi not MY kind sajaa! I think it'd be the majority's love though.. Ehehehe.. so no worries aight ;) movie is STILLLLLLLLLL spleendddidd! WATCH IT PEOPLE, SUPPORT SI WU ZUN! I heard he was at Empire early this week and was allowing people to meet him there... people who have the tickets to his movie saja :P . DAMN! OPPORTUNITY LIKE THIS IS LIKE .. bleee. Kalau si Yumni, mati2an kali kan k Empire tu~ .. haha .. she doesn't like to miss this kind of opportunity (meeting celebrities) !

Ti Amo by 炎亞綸 & 劉力揚:

Ok, the first part was an okay but if you reach its chorus, right when Jade starts singing 'Ti Amoo Ti Quiero~', the song just give chills all over me! She's really TALENTED . So nice her voice laa. M falling for her :P Liu Li Yang/Jade~ :) ! Even the kids love it!

Chemistry Practical

"Jah.. sihat usulnya jerawat mu atu, jah"

So far no one have commented like that :P . I can imagine them saying it though! HAHAHA kalau ada, abis ku tarik spendednya!!! Tapi er.. they did say other stuff like "Eh bisai eh.. masak jerawatnya aah!" . And yes, another jerawat have established on my face and guess where!! OH YOU KNOW WHERE!!! YES, YUM! THAT IS WHERE!!

Anyways, I was the only LOWER SIX STUDENT today. Ehehe, Cool pulang. I got to talk to the U6 students. Fahim especially. Then there was that Mr. Doodey's friend, Syu'aib. My god, beautiful name right!!!! (respect man... nama nabi, as they say) Hahaha .. nicknamenya syubu tapi .. which er.. haha.. m not a big fan of ;P

Practical Exam was .. uh.. let's just say, HECTIC.

First question was on titration but I wasn't allowed to do that first and I think that's a good thing, cause the Second question was soooo... UNFAMILIAR. Langsung new to me!! Drawing up the boxes for the results were good though ;) I've been worrying most about that and thank god, I got through it!

Results achieved from the second practical was also done well! Woohoo! As in checking for its accuracy was ALL good . tapi the calculation, I assume, was furked up. wait.. lemme just recall banar2... Ah... wait.. not so furked up. Phew But you know.. I can be wrong ;( 'cause practical stuff is reaaaaaaaaaaaally unpredictable.

Third question was slightly crappy but I got the results correctly but the part where we had to work out the chemical properties of the two cations... I think.. i THINK I may have got one part of it wrong. Then they asked..

"A gas is evolved in this reaction:

Hydrogen, Carbon Dioxide OR Oxygen.

According to its density, which gas should be approriately tested first and explain the reason to your answer"

At the first 2 minutes, I was panicking like shit. And this was the very time when I dropped the FA5 powder onto my answer paper :( . So the whole thing became VERY VERY messy. So anyways, I finally thought it through and decided to work out each of the gases' density (I assumed that's how we work it out ATLEAST!! haha.. I CAN'T REMEMBER !) . Worked out that Hydrogen is most densed one and the Carbon Dioxide, least densed (that is if my method was even correct!! HAHA) . And after thinking it through over n over, I finally decided to depend on this answer: Since Hydrogen is one with the highest density amongst the three gases, this gas would escape the fastest. Hence, it should be the first one to be tested.

It does sound pretty logical, no? But frankly, I have no idea if that is even true. If it is, I'd name the method "PIJAH PUNYA METHOD" :P . Hopefully it is anyway........ ARGH! Then it was also continued with further box-drawings and identities! EEE~ and I think I got through them well. And... the last part... well yeah, I missed it.

It's a stupid thing to have missed the 3marks question 'cause... it was something that I could have made up so easily even without doing the experiment!! AND I STUPIDLY LEFT THE QUESTION 1 MINUTE PRIOR TO THE END OF EXAM! OH Well, there goes those 3 easy marks!!

First question was titration. Been practising on its sort of question (very common from the past papers) for the whole 2 weeks and I...... screwed it all up. That dissapoints me truly .. I may have got the whole readings correctly. But the calculations bit were all.. furked up. Wait wait.. lemme recall... yep, FURKkkKkkeD Up!

But now thinking all of it thoroughly, I was satisfied with my whole effort and hopefully I'd get atleast better now =) ..well.. despite the fact that my answer sheet is all messy and very dirty from the FA5 powder and also the fact that it nearly got burnt. Imagine if it DID get burn! the whole class would be in a massacre! hahahaha!

I am also very proud of myself that no breaking sound can be heard from my table :P (I always manage to break something during a practical).. Thank God I didn't. I KNOW I'M CLUMSY.

But I did get burnt .. (part of my arm is blackened) by the blue flame at the very end of the experiment. I didn't care if it hurt or not because I was worried about EVERYTHING . hahaha. And now, it leaves another beautiful scar on my arm . WANNA SEE :P However cool it is (GILA KALI).. I still prefer my former scar (from MIGS) caused by the strong Sulphuric Acid which lead to this heart shape on my arm.. I admired it for many weeks :) (CONFIRM GILA ANAK NI HAHAHA)

Right, sorry for the boring crap. It helps me to release tension :) . I am just brainstorming here. So, you know .. dont force yourself to go through all :P hahaha.

Confidence...

"Believe that you can do it and only then, you can be calm....."

A wise man (boy in the outside :P) said that to me this afternoon. He's a one funny guy. Most of his words are wise and honest (something that's rare to find in guys of his age... seriously). He's sensitive, though..... But I know how most of the women are crazed for that sort of thing. HAHAHA.

4.30 was ze tuition... and I realised how I have lost my confidence in doing any practicals. Partly because experiences were not much... and that many grave mistakes were done during the June Paper that caused me the reasonable C . Hence, the words were given to me up there.And I think I'm feeling a lot better. Those were the words I myself used to say, but I dont know where that part of me went........

Or probably I've been refusing to think anything......

I better get prepared. Exams are incredibly scary. AND IT effin ANNOYS ME BIG TIME WHEN SOMEONE SAYS THAT "WE DO NOT NEED LUCKS IN OUR EXAMS .. SO GOOD LUCKS ARE NOT NECESSARY! BECAUSE EXAMS DEPEND ON OUR PAST EFFORT AND ONLY THAT!"

To those who have one mind with this person, I just feel like digging some soils up to feed you with it. EXAMS STILL NEED LUCK! WHAT IF YOU HAVE PANIC ATTACK?? OR THE 'MENTAL BLOCK'?? WHAT IF YOU HAVE THE WORST KIND OF INVIGILATORS (PRACTICALS CASES) ? WHAT IF YOU ENCOUNTER LACK OF CONFIDENCE ??

Also, we get encouraged when friends shout out their 'goodlucks' to us. It prevents us from thinking any bad lucks (as mentioned) that can occur to us. We feel more calmed and enligthened from any pressure we get. And that is how supports from the loved ones are VERY IMPORTANT.

All that said, I wish GOODLUCK to everyone for their upcoming exams ;) .

PS. Time for a late shower :P

awu .. lurus2 .. wajib dberitahu. LOL

The best of Wonder Girls! =) . I used to listen to this like 24 hours a day man... (awu bah, exaggeration bah! ....... atu pun.. eheh). And now that she's gone, I miss it and also ofcourse the person who promoted it :PPP .. And I still love the MV. Very sophisticated. The dance moves are like super WOW.

I have no mood to get myself updated with KMusic anymore. Actually, I hardly ever did~ it was my roommate who got me the songs. And they were all relaxing... One of my ingredients to good sessions of studying. Sadly... I just can't have that sort of thing anymore :( . But we'll see that in one month time.... right ;) .

Ps. YANG CALINYA VIDEO ANI, RIGHT WHEN si JYP WAS BERIA-ING, ada tedangar bunyi tainya keluar!! mahal tu aahh hahahaha! now that's something!

Nokia Nokiaaa~

the newest NOKIA PC SUITE is DAMMNNN neat!! Seee kaann~ Nokia is cool bah! Jaantah kan bali those other kinds bah.. I tried to convince the whole class back in KL... but ofcourse...... none listened to my so-called bull crap... which it hardly is, man. hehe. but stillll~ to those who are willing to listen! nokia atu bagus baahh! well erm.. i dont have major points to back me up :P but tapi kan.... you know... you can survive with it bah and it's all good for you (lau radiation, sama tah jua pulang nda baiknya hahahaha). Anyways, Ceramah will be continued... err... soon. Hehehe.

So, kan~ why I'm complimenting its neatness is that .. I finally got to upload my 4 months pictures that have been bangasing in zees phone of mine. And off courshe, ada foto2 yg mashih ku fakai brashes (talking in braces mode :P). Ehehe, Hmm.. And yes, I'm too lazy to post 'em :P .

Yesterday, I think it was such a good luck to have seen a rainbow that close & clearly. It's safe to say that it was a first time to see it hampir banar =) so I took a pic of it with my "NOKIA" phone :PP (cuba kamu liat~ even the quality of the picture boleh tahan jua kan? - sampat lagi tu) . So right, I got so excited over zat rainbow because si Barney has been influencing me with his songs!!! And also all the other colourful cartoons. Macam yesterday, I had to endure the ze Dora the Explorer for 30 mins ... and she had to save the baby pink dolphin by bringing her back to ze mother pink dolphin who lives right where the rainbow comes out from. and OMG, the journey had its obstacles like ze waterfall!! And as an audience, I had to navigate her (ENERGETICALLY!) to go left and right and good thing she listened to me, THANK GOD! :PPP She listens well.

I was also watching the album of the 'LAME PARIEHS'. This group of people is one of the most talented people I've ever seen performing through HANDPHONES. Like seriously, they'd win mTV if they were to join it!! I'd get their autographs in miliseconds if I see them! My compliments to you people :PPPPPPP . Only one person knows what random tai I'm saying.. Ehehee.

Something v. sweet:

The fragrance of our friendship,

Sweeter than the morning dew

The radiance of our friendship,

Twinkles prettier than young stars

That day I met you, my heart opened up,

Warm thoughts and firm trust permeates

through us,

The deepest secrets we revealed,

The deeper crushes lie concealed

As days passes by, my heart sang out,

Realised I had found a rare friend in you,

You who calmy hears my sorrows,

You who brightens up tomorrows

Alas, soon one day I shall say Good Bye,

Nostalgic memories will fade away,

I wrote this poem to show you,

And hope it would truly please you

The beauty of our friendship,

Full of grace, like a butterful

The secret of our Friendship,

Bittersweet and just implicit!

Thank You =)

OFF TO SCHTUDY :D.

I'm such a rajin Blogger.

Why is it that I tend to blog more when Exam approaches?

Did nothing much for the day. I had a great intention to raya at one of my best friends', Nurul Ain. However, I had problems with transportation and also with the fact that a v. V. LAST MINUTE CALL for tuition came up. Pfft. LOL. But atleast, I managed to revise through my STATS. Sorry, Ain.

Mummy & Daddy went to jog at Damuan after that. Knowing nothing of the plan, I wore Baju Kurung. Antah mengapa. Hahaha.. just in the mood, I guess. So, I planned to stroll around and just take few shots of the place. That wouldn't be possible as well. *Sigh, my left foot is temporarily disabled and I don't wanna be seen walking like a CLOWN. So, I just continued my STATS in the car and listened to Bruneian radio, Crystal FM. There was this competition to win the tickets to watch HSM3 at Empire. And I was thinking of taking part since them kids crazed for the movie :D . hehehe. But naaaah, I malas listen to radio :P .

Holding a pen atu kira belajar lah tu... eheh.

And noo.. that's my angan2 look .. not my study look :P ..

My study look = Orang nada mood usulnya :P

Went to CA. Mohd after that. Last time I went here was like 3 weeks ago.. with friends. I ordered the usual thing: Roti Telor :P . But my current addiction now is no more MILO PINK/ICE MILO.. It'sssssssssssssss HORLICK PINK!! OH NYAMM! totally seductive mann! haha.

Anywaysss, I just flicked through Mr. Rare's blog and found his latest post v. important.

The Quran had mentioned that every each one of us have our own flaws. He then continued with a Prophet saying that "Barangsiapa yang menutup aib orang laen, Allah akan menutup aibnya" Whoever covers the flaws of the others will have his or her flaws coverd by Allah. I think what it's saying there is that we should respect the others of their flaws instead of publicising it.

IN OUR MODERN LANGUAGE, it'd be... KIDS! STOP BIT*HING ABOUT! (backstabbing!) or IN BRUNEI, ADANG TAH NGUCAP! !

I seriously want to improve myself by working on that. Insyaallah. I have said this once before in my previous blog ... we must accept people's flaws and try to adapt to it. Thank You, Mr. Rare for posting that one up. Good lesson for me :) .

*Sigh.. Three days of holiday is gone now.... Tomorrow, I have many things to do in mind ie. ask series of questions to the HEU. Hmm... I hope I would get some serious answers from them 'cause maybe then I can decide FOR REAL.

To the person who had succesfully made the "SUSHI BOMB" . Congratulations :D .. Just don't ever let that thing come CLOSER than 5 MILES to me. Eyekkhh!

Currently addicted to:

P.Pop's BUKAN SUPERSTAR!

Exploring further.

Today was quite fun. Fun in a sense that... I haven't been out for a long time and that I have been wishing for a fresh air! I joined my parents to the hospital. My dad had to go for a check-up while I managed to revise through alot of the chemistry syllabus. My weak parts are at Equilibria and few of the equations which needs to be memorised. Sigh. There's just a LOT but generally, I am satisfied with all the theories now. It's the practical that makes me gulp 24 hours. And on Thurs, I shall face my destiny.

This woman made me laugh to death in the car. I WILL TELL YOU WHAT HAPPENED, YUM!!

OMFRIKINGOD!

Anyways, I finally got to see RIPAS after quite a long time. Nothing much have changed. I've always liked the calmness you get here and the people are just nice "Duh..??" . Went to PANTAI JERUDONG then. OMG.. It's been a long time! Hehehe. Actually around a month or so... I went here as well with my sister but it was at a different section (A more peaceful place) . Sigh... I enjoy the cool breeze :) no wonder many couples go here for a date! =P . And I've never experienced that sort of date.. Pfffft! So, my mum was here for the pasar.

One month ago. With Kaka & them!!

I discovered that the building was a part of the EMPIRE HOTEL.

DAYANA TERSAYANG :)

AND THIS WAS THE PASAR WE WENT TO, TODAY :)

Tell you what, the further down you go, the more revolting the smell gets. Haha... indeed, I am not used to it. So as I walking with my camera on my hand and some icky stuff on the other, a familiar tune was suddenly struck into my ears. It was repetitive that gave me some time to realise that it must have been from my past. And then, as I rummaged through the brain, some scenes started to flicker inside my head. I sped up passing the dead fishes and the unhygienic cats and as I raced to its noise, I finally got the name and saw it on its own little van. I was right:

"Mister Softy". I remember a nice guy who worked there whom I first saw at Gadong and saw the next year again (as I returned to Brunei for another holiday) at our Simpang in Jerudong. He was still as friendly as ever and I never doubt that he had forgotten me.

The one marked in red circle! =D . OH NYAM!!!

My mouth was watering like hell for it and another brainstorm was formed in my head..

"Man.. that tune sure knows how attract people! Come on, Jah! You're going to Aminah Arif jua after this! Would you wish to have the curvy kind or the totally roundy one?? EXACTLY MAN, think of how many calories are put in those sweet stuff! But... I haven't had those in like 5 years.. back when Adriana was only 2 or 1. And who knows when I'll bump into them again?? :( PFFFFFFFFT! JAH! YOU'RE LIVING IN BRUNEI ALREADY! You're never going to escape this so-called "heaven" of yours. So STOP THINKING and just help your mum pick those fishies. Eww.. disgusting man! .. Leh, atu pun! just dont think more and don't you dare go there. But but~ look at this kid beside me... Those creamy stuff he's licking right infront of me! Well....... would you look at him go! Hmm, having a lil doesn't really hurt now to think of it, sikit sja tapi. But you know, if you think MOOOREE about it, it would seriously be fattening especially since you have that function to go tonight!"

And they continue to argue until in the end, it was too late to have any! HAHAHA. And I've been crazy these days. I talk to myself like the convo. up there. I KNOW!! CRAZY RIGHT?? BUT I CAN'T STOP IT! IT HELPS ME TO DECIDE ON THINGS (considering the fact that I'm indecisive). It seriously works and I even get to bitch about someone to myself! HAHAHA.. LIKE "Eh.. orang atu ah.. mmbari sasak eh.. cuba pikirkan hati ORANG KAH!!! AWU BAH! PALOI EH!" Okay .. yeah .. now it seems too crazy. HAHAHA. I'll stop humiliating now then. And sometimes, I even think it's the divine voice from above. Okay, I'll stop it now. Shit man, that was all too much. Yes, I am crazy.. I know I know. That's it.. I'm stopping.

ANYWAYYYYYYYYYYYS, Aminah Arif then. Met another relative though unfamiliar. He was friendly .. like extremely friendly. HAHAHA I CALL ANYONE THAT NOWADAYS :P It's either "super" or "extremely" . PFFT. hehe, And rupa2nyaaa~ he's an MD teacher! and I was like.. NO WONDEEERRR I recognise that spec of his :) . And he brought me to a conversation and was really surprised how he seemed close with my parents. Yes, so many surprising things just keep facing me here. Newbie bah.. Newbie!

The function that night... it was pretty fun. I get to hear some stories and saw my parents having fun with their cliques! The cake was sooo Le-Apple-like.. as in.. GOOD!! Rasa ice creamnya atu sama baah. Suka ku tu! NYAM! And I saw him. Alas.... it's been TOO long and unbelievably, I still remember him...an object from my past. I still do.....

I leave you with a korean-like picture of Dayana I just took. Hehe, emo berabis!

TO SIR RICKOOO~ (you know who you are) , I am so worried of that cut you made :( . PLEASE BE CAREFUL NEXT TIME!!!

TO KWKWWW/YUM/ANAK #6~ DID YOU CALL ? SORRY, ARAH RUMAH TGH. HJ MAIL tadi~~ WE CAME HOME PRETTY LATE. GO ONLINE BAAAAAAHHH :((( . MISS YOU LIKE HELL. AND you will have visitors next week ;) look forward to it k :DDDD . DAMN IT!!! I WANNA GO TO KL MANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!! Righ when I finished dying to live in Brunei, I just miss KL so much.. malar jua sudah ku cakap kan ? hahaha.

night lads & lassies.

PS. WOOHOO! WHAT AN ACCOMPLISHMENT MANN! I ACTUALLY MANAGED TO PUT FEW PICS UP THERE~ WOHOOO! WOHOOO WOHOO !!!! (kes kambang nii)

The "Ambung" Me.

if you're HANDSOME and you treat ze women extremely friendly...

you're gonna hurt a lot of them~, seriously.

somehow, i think being "ambung" is just better for you people =/ .

Anyways, despite all that, another criticism had been thrown at me for being "ambung". LOL, it just brought me back to the old days. I remember doing so to Medina ( Miss you girl )= ) back in MIGS . It was a funny phase during when our friendship had yet to grow. I found Lutec already and have gotten to know most of the friends. So, in my heart, I was like "Aahh~ I don't feel like getting to know any newbies laa." And hahahaha~ even though, Meddie sat next to me in Chem class ... I just looked the other way and completely ignored her. Maaf ya med! Kok g bisa judess gitu sihh! Hahahaha~ But in the end, I think it was Lutec who brought us together :P . Miss the moments with you two eg. MAKAN ESKRIM AT THE PRIMARY SECTION, DOING OUR SO CALLED PREFECT DUTY :P :P . Hahahaha~ Can we ever bring those days back again :( ??

And then there goes MAHSA, my college before I left Msia for MD. I saw Hema sitting alone in a class that I was instructed to go into. I put on my friendly mode and started introducing myself to her and chat CHAT chat. Then after 15-30 mins or so, Syu came into the room. And in my heart goes "I've got Hema already. Hmmm, no need to put on my friendly mode to her lah"... and only now I'm saying "WTF WAS WRONG WITH ME??" hahahaa. And then, after 5 months... there was Kat~ whom I totally TOTALLY ignored. WTH??? hahahaa~ I'm so sorry people.

I'll tell you something just to back me up why I'm pretty ambung: I had the worst experiences during primary.. back in Indonesia. I dont want to revive those memories. Other than that, those who are my relatives... I know I'm AWFULLY ambung! Please PLEASE PLEASEEEE, I can't stop it BAH.. I dont know HOW! Hahaha.. there's this one dude who said "err.. just BE friendly" . Pffft. I'll try atleast ... Too nervous saja .. I get all fidgetty. And then, I'd be enountering a thousand of guilts in me heart. Susah eh Susah! :P

I just want to say. I've said this thousand times. I make the WORST out of first impressions, mainly for being sombong/ambung. It's a crazy habit of mine :( but you should all know that, within my heart, I always say "I wish I can start a conversation with you... but I just dont know...... how :( ". But one thing is funny. When I'm friendly, I am known for being TOO friendly that just scare them. ARGH, WHY AM I NOT CONSISTENT, MAN!

I'd stop whining there :P I wanna insert old pictures here. Tapi kan... again.. Hahaha... I'm too frikin' LAZY. And I'm seriously bummed out from my maths exam. So moodku = ARGH. hehehe. But I'm still nice ... dont worry. Alrighty then, I love you all. Missing those in KL! :) . Somehow, memories I have built there aren't enough.

Hahaha another sad tone yea? Antah ah... I still feel out of place sometimes here. Pfft. Normal thing when you're still adapting to it. And tomorrow, there's a school thing at ICC .. and I'm still deciding whether I shall go for it or not. HAHAHA, atu pun! And OMG, I just found somehow who's SOOO like me. We have so many things in common. Hahaha~ it's just amazing bah.

My heart to blog is gradually decreasing. Sigh, I feel bad. Goodnight Lads.

AS EXAMS! BEGINNN!

8.30pm and I just returned home with my school uniform still on. Tuesdays & Wednesdays are both taking me ages to go through 'em. I do have the most fun out of it with friends. And thank god, Saturday is a holiday~ that means I can have a long weekend rest from ALL these tiring days. WOHOOO~

About that quiting plan. This particular someone just gave me these second thoughts!!! AND YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE! Like I've said... I'm indecisive. But somehow, I seriously value his opinions, probably because he's open and critical. He said he was against it. I don't really grasped the reason to it well and it did made me wander in my own tiny brain for quite a while but in the end~ he finally said he wouldn't recommended me to do it but if he was in my shoes, he would choose to do it. And his points to this was exactly the same as to the reasons why I want to quit. AND FINALLYYY~ that got me pretty satisfied! ATLEAST kan~ HE WOULD "DO IT" .. but pfft.. he still wouldn't recommend me to do it... pfft.

Anyways.. I can't really type more out of today. I mean, a lot had happened... but I'm just too tired to narrate it all. Plus with all the exams... argh. I've been considerably LAZY and only tonight I feel the fear of the paper that will be set infront of me. Yes, examinations are commenced as of tomorow and I'm not ready for PRACTICAL. Ya Allah, please guide me well for the preparations! Atleast tomorow is P1 Maths. I did pretty well for the Mocks and hopefully, I can do better for the paper tomorow. WISH ME LUCK!!! ESPECIALLY YOU, YUM!

To my Lovely Kwkw !!

I just received a phone from Yum.. and we ALL miss dearly!!!!
Love you, KWKW!! I MISS YOU SO BLOODY MUCH!!!! Take Care ah!!!
Belajar Banar2 .. just think that it will soon end and you will leave to Brunei... WITH US :)))))
I'm watching ANOTHER CINDERELLA STORY :) not bad la cetanyaa.. and i'm soo interested in that Mamma Mia !! :DDDD
Goodnight!! SLEEP TIGHT !! Just CHAT / CALL IF ANYTHIGN!!
LOVE YOU FOREVER AND EVER !!

Ola! (with a runny nose & a scarred throat)

Today was pretty plain. I finished my classes at 11. That being the advantage I get every Saturday :) and I love bragging about it to this particular person :P . Classes were fine and I think I may actually be leaving. It's pretty sad though.. I've gotten to know more about few people and I've got some offers to join their clubs... like hiking, choir and this environmental thingy (Lupa sajaa bukan nda ingau!!). And I thought of joining it, especially choir and I already told her that I'll be leaving in a month and she was like "Just perform with us for the Cultural Night." and after many arguments between the voices in my head (not penyakit mental tu ah.. it's a matter of conscience really), I decided to agree on it (still a maybe pulang.. REMEMBER THE INDECISIVE ME??). I thought it'd be a good idea to have some memories made and be gone with it! Tapi ada exams kann.. Antah ah.. Grrrh.. atu pun payahh!

Went off to Giant after that. Turned out that one of my friends' father from back in BIS works here as er.. em.. don't know. Haha, but this place is really giant for Brunei and it was my mum's first time .. so she was both amazed and happy that Brunei finally have a version of its own Carrefour! LOL! I mean.. Giants di malaysia is relatively smaller (yg ku parnah liat lahh for the past 3 years!) but carrefour there n in indon is bwaahh, puass~ .. macam ani jua lah. Shopped for a bit and went to fetch Abang's 31st cake.. then HOME sweeettt HOMEEE! antah ah.. lately I'm just so in love with my home.. It's like I get homesick once I'm over 6-7 Km away from it. Sedih inda?? How would I be when I go overseas then?? Duh pijahh.. there's something called ADAPTATION !

Ok, that's it .. I feel like putting few pictures now.. Let's just hope I make till the end :P

Hari Raya!

Salam to Everyone! J

Indeed I have been absent for quite a while. I just don’t have the heart to blog anymore
L . Oh don’t take me wrong! I LOVE blogging! It’s just that.. I get sort of discouraged when asked to paste some photos in my blog. Again, I love doing that and I know people long to see them but thing is, my laptop goes all fizzy when I try to upload and I get all pressured by that and now, if I think about all those, I am just sooo not bothered to do it anymore!!! LOL. I’m sorry.

So, this forever will be a photo-less blog :P . Pheeeewwwwww~ all that finally said, my heart ishh v. legaaa~ J . Anyways, raya has been a blast! A week with Yum and the rest here, was ofcourse, one of the reunions awaited. Raya is always something I look forward to. Relatives and Families grew closer to each other and I like to see the intimacy.

First day was filled with heartful loads of greetings and loves, a day for only the closed ones to our family. Second day, the family went to Balik Kampung to Temburong and trip to there is always FUN !!! This year, Kaka was the main source of it! Sadly, our trip there only lasted till about 1 since we had to return for fear of the most ugliest Queue seen in Brunei (inda ja??). Third day was the open house, helped here and there and went around to see whether my friends were coming or not... And in the end, I realised I have forgotten to invite half of them. Yes, I know I know, it’s me what! ARGH! Fourth day was the sorrowful day when the siblings
left to KL L and the house, unusually motionless. Then school days began.

I still feel lonely at times but I know that’s normal. I am still quite new. A friend once said, being depressed is what makes you feel lonely and not the fact that you’re alone. Have I been depressed? I may have been. But somehow, I am shadowed by a mask when I am in this school. Hehe.. Well, it was like that during the few first months in MIGS. And now I realised how much I
miss my friends over in KL & Jakarta and how their companies mean alot to me J . I’ve been selfish, always isolating myself and only approach things when I’m that desperate. Human beings are selfish. I hate that.

So anyways, I love going to school, nevertheless :D . And I am going to miss MD after next month. Indeed, I may me quiting this school . Sigh... I hate it that when I start something... I never managed to finish them! It’s a crazy habit! But that’s just natural Me. Lol, great excuse, no!

So yeah, I have been seeking advices from few teachers and friends whether quiting may be the right choice. And majority of them said that I have been wasting my time in this school and will be if I continue to enroll to classes which I have already gone through for the past year! Ahaha, I knew it. So their answers are basically Yes because by June, they would be only completing about 30-40% of the syllabus. So, the teacher said it would be better if I just take tuitions for the rest of the 6 months.

And for few days, I was still roaming around my mind whether the decision to quit is the right one. Antah wah... Sayang jua inda skolah L The environment is already good. Though I may still be in the proccess of adjusting to it, it would be quite a loss to just drop out from it. But!!!! I prioritise my studies before Families/Friends. And I guess, as many have said, quiting would be the right thing.

Sigh~ another leave certificate then! LOL .. but who knows~ I may just change my mind in a week’s time :P That’s why I’m still surveying people’s opinion! Ahahaa.

So yesterdayyy... I went to beraya with my close friend, Afni at the Kampong Ayer. It was AMAZINGGGGGG~ !! I was like a damn tourist and I think it was obvious larr.. looking at my reactions to everything! Ahahaha. First house was her grandparents and then her family’s house and then her ex-classmate and then to some people’s house. Lol, sadly that was about it. Lol, because of Meee being NOT ON TIME, we only got around like 5-6 houses. So sorry, Afni! Even I wasn’t satisfiedddd~ So went to roam Yayasan for a while there. Not much places but found a bookstore. Nyehehe.. And for today, I only raya’ed at Tg. Dula’s house. Yes, I am utterly commited to my studies :P . EXAMS IN 5 DAYS MAN! BAIK JUA SADAR DIRI KAN??? Hehe.

AND OMFG, I HAD THE MOST BIGGEST WAR WITH A LALAT YESTERDAY MORNING!! Long story cut short: It began at 0615am and ended around 0642am and it invovled me in desperate to release the tension on the toilet seat :P and some flapping wings that BzZz BzzZZZz . GAAAAH!

Goodnight Lads & Gents. If I haven’t wish you all Selamat Hari Raya, well..

Selamat Hari Raya,

Maaf Zahir dan Batin. Forgive me of my wrong-doings J